Monday, 22 March 2010

It Hurts

It’s strange how one game can make you feel inferior and unwanted. Yes it hurt when forgot to call because of a GAME. It hurts every fourth day when all the memories we shared appear as if they are suddenly forgotten by him. I don’t know if its some kind of hypnosis or charm that they have over him that makes him even forget the letters that spell my name. It hurts when he’s capable of spending almost 3 X 86400 seconds of his life with them but struggles to even spend 7 X 7200 seconds with me every week. I know I’m more important but I fail to understand his way of expressing it. It’s no use thinking about it until I’m able to make him step into my shoes. But I never want him to step into my shoes, because it sure as hell pains.

[Loads of thoughts changed once I talked to him and tried understanding his condition. But the truth is I can runaway from the world but I can’t run away from myself. So I’m being honest as this is what went through my mind that very moment.]

Friday, 12 March 2010

"Puni" is..

i received a message which had a few columns that i had to fill out which would then tell the person what i feel about him. it was pretty sweet and i forwarded it to a bunch of my friends. i got the most adorable and lovely replies. Just to make sure i dont lose them i want to write them.
Here goes:

"puni" is
Ichik:
incomplete without: Ur specs!
Perfect if: U eat non veg! hehe
Best paired with: Ur bf!
Better without: Books!
Nice when: U open ur hair!
Stupid when: When you cry or shout!

Pandit: (anubhav)
incomplete without: Harshu boy!
Perfect if: Taller!
Best paired with: Firas!
Better without: her intelligent mind (i luv u whn u act silly evn though ur not)
Nice when: Speakng on the phn
Stupid when: She defies her high IQ sumtymes wid silly actions

Nilay:
incomplete without: Sulking
Perfect if: Stays the same
Best paired with: Jhaboy. BIg tym..!!
Better without: Books
Nice when: you are nice to her
Stupid when: she is awake

Harshay:
incomplete without: Smile
Perfect if: Slimmer
Best paired with: Animesh kishore d nly person of ur height ;p, obviously ME
Better without: *******
Nice when: Tharki
Stupid when: Being possesive

Assy:
incomplete without: Her loved ones
Perfect if: stays the same
Best paired with: Me..!!
Better without: ppl who dnt c wht she's wrth
Nice when: isnt dealing with reecal or manasi
Stupid when: !! i thot u admitted u alwz are !!

Chakshu:
incomplete without: Smile
Perfect if: a bit taller
Best paired with: Evry1 i know
Better without: Tears
Nice when: wid me.. dunno abt others
Stupid : Always

Firas:
incomplete without : Your laughter
Perfect if: you have more balls
Best paired with: the 4 of us
Better without: The 3 of us
Nice when: Aways to me
Stupid : ALWAYS..!!


i hope all of 'em love me forever as much as..!!

happie happie happie..!!

Monday, 8 March 2010

Trapped

Exactly 365 days ago i had been sitting in the exact same position, bending my back with my head into a class 12 textbook. Printed pages that were supposed to give me a better future.
Three hundred and sixty five days ago i had never thought that I'd be doing all that again.
I've had TIME to carefully look at my mistakes and make sure that i don't repeat them, but this time seems more than enough. i realize I've just got a few more weeks to slog and after that a better life would await me (HOPEFULLY). But FRUSTRATION has set in. I'm tired of it all. This is all Ive been doing for the past 1 year and i SO want to take a break. Lie down with no thoughts of remaining syllabus. Watching movies guilt free. Hanging out with the people who who have been cursing me for not spending time with them. Reading novels. Playing games all day. Just wasting my time.. huh i wish

Its true the last few steps to the goal are the hardest...