To Getting back on the Feet

A teacher of mine used to say "a cluttered table means a cluttered mind" (some of you know who I'm talking about, and I'd be glad if you stop fantasizing). But the point is my table's been pretty cluttered lately. There is so much going on, and there is much more going on in my mind. I have lots to do (but so do others), I'm sort of under pressure to perform and i have deadlines lingering, still in reality the sky isn't falling upon me right now but in my mind its the dooms day, everyday.

i have been wanting to write from so long, wanting to vent it out, "to share and lessen the bear" but I've made up my mind that i don't have the time to neatly arrange things in a pile too. Which is the permanent damage Ive brought upon myself, like so many other things that i drive myself crazy with. So today i decided "to hell with everything". i decided give it in "procrastination's" face and take the step, which started with reading Firas' post. And now here i am writing my own. It might be among the bad ones (i know there are worst), it might not be fancy enough to cover up for the famine months that went by but it sure is my my metaphor for walking ahead. To my new found ray of light,




Charred up trees, singed old leaves
The bleak scenery and the spider weaves.
What had stood, rose in smoke
Blistered feet without much hope
Scared were the people, to open the eyes
As dreary clouds had filled the skies.
There was cast, a holocaust
Souls without the bodies had died.
But they couldn't, what he could see,
On the horizon, looming oh so far
'fear not the flames' he affirmed
As from them, a phoenix is about to rise.

With the wind

When she told the winds to send you her love
did they stop by and rustle in your ear?
Could u tell
Of what they smelt,
If it was rain or her tears?
Was it pain or just a cry
Calling you oh, so near?
Meet me, she had said,
Meet me at the pier.
Just a glance, a touch, a kiss
demands that seemed so mere.
Yet you couldn't fulfill
Something that to both of you was clear.
Did you not long for her anymore
or was losing love a fear?
When she told the winds to send you all her love
did they really stop by and rustle in your ear?

The mind's play day

There is everything around us. And sometimes there are incidents that change you inside. And its then that u start paying attention to everything that has been staring at you forever.  There are things you want and things that you want from life. I got somethin, as its said, prematurely. Inevitable as it is I couldn't have it. Didn't even want getting it at this point of life, rather hated what I would have loved having had it been a few years down the line.

Now when its gone, when it was made to go why does it feel wrong. Why Is the, then correct ,choice I made making me hollow. Every path that I take, every single turn and every little stop points to what I lost. Whenever I feel I've forgotten and I'm moving on all of it just somehow presents itself to me and there occurs a reverie.
There was nothing else that could have been done. It was a dead end so then It shouldn't, but it does feel wrong.

Not tired but ya I do want a break from searching the answers. May b I just ask myself too many questions.